Fear

Goaly was so happy to have the amazing Terri Cole right here, in Copenhagen!  Her talk was dedicated to our well known “frenemy” : fear.

Terri is now launching a 4 week program with experts as Marie Forleo, Danielle Leporte, Gabrielle Bernstein, Meggan Watterson, Kate Northrup among many other A-listers.  Check out her course right here

The event & Photoshoot:

Around 50 female CEO`s and bloggers participated at the event, and we were so inspired by stories around the table from the world´s happiest country – Denmark!

After filming and planning, we did a photo shoot with the top Scandinavian Photographer Fred Jonny.

 

Photo Shoot The Scandinavian Way..
Photo Shoot The Scandinavian Way..

Working with him, was a great honor! From shooting the top brands and fashion magazines, he took the trip over to capture the true beauty of one of the world´s leading therapist and life coaches. After the shoot we went directly to the event place @ CharlottenBorg Cafe. Terri had exactly 5 minutes to prepare, after working on tour with one of her A-list clients for a month – we thought she liked a hectic schedule :)

Charlottenborg Cafe

 

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We were so blessed connecting with Denmark´s leading jewelry maker Mads Heindorf. In his store, we picked out jewelry that was hand made and a perfect fit for out theme. With a jewelry guard at our side, we shot photos at Copenhagen’s best locations, fighting rain and wind.

- Luckily our experienced Photographer and assistant knew how to make the best out of the situation!

Tiny Sneak peak of photoshoot
Tiny Sneak peak of photoshoot – with Mads Heindorf jewlery.

Our favorite pick from his collection was the meditating buddha with 10 sapphires and diamonds… ( Visit his store here if you feel like updating your jewelry collecting and insurance policy! )

Another surprise for our event, was Denmark´s green genius Eric Florent. From the same location (If you want to visit and take a look at flower walls and sun cell driven flower decorations! )

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During his many travels around the globe, he observed and collected a variety of species from different environments – and created installations that is perfectly suited to our interior! The big “buzz” was the 3-meter tall “flower walls” that watered themselves, and the eco-friendly glasses that was powered by the sun and gave a beautiful lighting effect at the flowers at night!

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A big thanks to http://karmameju.com/ for providing some amazing Goodie-bags for Terri - and pure organic oils for the audience! 

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Thank you to all helpers during the event, and a special thanks to Fred Jonny´s assistant, Sarah (Our beloved DOP) Mell and our stylist for the day And any other day) Yunah! 

Woman on Cliff, Arvind Devalia, Goaly Blog

Fear is that powerful menace which haunts many of us from the time we are children to the moment of our last breath.

For life coach, psychotherapist and strategist Terri Cole, however, fear isn’t as terrifying as you’d think. Through a few simple, serious steps, you can start to dismantle the walls of fear which have been confining you.

Taking the Terror Out of Fear

1. Fear is just a feeling

We’ve been lulled into believing fear is more than just a feeling.

However, it’s just that: a feeling, an emotion. In the same way that you can be happy, sad, joyous or contemplative, you can be afraid.

“Fear is just like every other emotion, but somehow, in this world, it’s gotten this elevated status,” Cole said. “Start thinking about fear as you would other feelings. You have the power to change the way that you feel.”

“If fear is just a feeling, you have the power to change it.”

Recognizing that fear is just an emotion is a very good thing, Cole said, because it opens you up to be able to control your fears as you would other emotions.

“Imagine that fear is just a feeling and not a fact, how would your life change,” Cole asked. “Unless you live in an active war zone, 98% of the time the fear that you are feeling is just a feeling. If fear is just a feeling, you have the power to change it.”

2. Create a sacred space

Think of the first step in conquering fear — that fear is just a feeling — as the tool you’ll use to start working on your relationship with fear.

You’ll need a workshop to get the work done, and that’s where a “zen den” comes into play.

“This is a sacred space in your home where you can do the work we’re talking about, where you can meditate, to think and to expand,” Cole said.

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Decorate your space with calming accents which inspire you, whether they’re candles, pictures of loved ones or leaves and flowers.

“All you want for a zen den is a place for you to take a nice, deep breath and exhale,” Cole said. “This is going to be a place to meditate because this work is best done in a space where you can create some stillness and silence internally.”

3. Relax

Your zen den is the workshop where your work will get done.

In order to get that work started, you’ll need to be relaxed. Calm. Focused. Centered. Getting to that point is a difficult one. For many — Cole included – a state of relaxation is best achieved through mediation.

“You need to have an open mind to see what it is you need to see.”

Once you reach this meditative, relaxed state, you’ll be ready to ask some hard questions in the next tip.

“You need to have an open mind to see what it is you need to see,” Cole aid.

4. Ask Yourself the Hard Questions

“I hope that you’re sitting in your sacred space so that you feel expansive and you’re brave enough to look the real answers for you so you will be able to decode your relationship to fear,” Cole said.

Questions about your family of origin are a key element in confronting your fears and getting to the root of their power over you.

Many times, Cole said, the influence of fear on your life is a direct result of the environment you grew up in. Terri’s “Conquer Your Fears and Find True Freedom” free video strategy explores this environment with a series of probing questions.

We’ve included three of those questions here:

  • What was your family’s relationship to fear? Was there a lot of superstitions? How was your family origin when it came to fear?
  • What was your parents’ view of the world? Did they see it as a generous benevolent place or did they see it as a scary place?
  • Did your parents suffer in their own relationship to their own fear? Did they have anxiety, difficulty sleep or were they always afraid something was going to happen to you?

Bidding Farewell to Fear

As we said before, Terri Cole’s “Conquer Your Fears and Find True Freedom” free video strategy is a tremendous resource for your self-exploration and personal development. Her video also includes a fantastic meditation exercise. Check it out!

In the meantime, you take a look at Terri’s introductory video for her free series on fear:

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Megaphone, Public Speaking, Patricia Stark

We fear public speaking…

The thought of speaking in front of a crowd of people is enough to make most of us sick to our stomach.

Nerves often get the best of us as we say our first words, then the beautiful mosaic of spoken artistry we envisioned in our minds unravels into a tangly mess of stuttering, mispronunciation and the general feeling that you’d rather be any place in the world other than where you’re standing.

We never quite say what we want to say and we never quite express the emotions we want to express.

That’s why we talked with New York-based communications coach Patricia Stark, who told us that your success in public speaking boils down to three basic principles.

“Those three things will help ground you and anchor you to be really sure that this situation unfolds the way that you’re hoping that it will,” Stark said, “and that the people on the receiving end will understand your message and why you’re delivering it.

The FOX News anchor and actress gave us three areas essential to confident, excellent public speaking:

1. Intention

Public speaking requires that you have an intention. That intention will be the guiding principle behind what you say and how you say it.

The best way to set yourself up for success in the public speaking arena is to focus your attention on the audience, Stark said.

Microphone, Public Speaking, Patricia Stark

“Your first intention has to be, ‘How can I be of service?’ and ‘How can I give something of value here?’ and ‘What can I do to either educate them, motivate them, inspire them and give them something they can leave with in their lives and benefit them,’” she said.

“Everything tends to fall into place and takes care of itself when you have the right intention.”

Once your focus is in the right place and your intentions are others-centered, you’ll notice public speaking or presenting becomes a little easier.

“Once you have the right intention and your priority is the audience member, and you make it be about them, it takes an enormous amount of pressure off you,” Stark said. “Everything tends to fall into place and takes care of itself when you have the right intention. “

2. Belief

What you believe about your cause, argument, idea or business is an indispensable part of your public speaking arsenal. Belief is not only important in the sense that it strengthens your confidence in what you have to say, but it makes what you’re saying authentic and believable for your audience.

“You have to believe wholeheartedly in what you are about to say and do because, if you aren’t 100% convinced yourself, you’ll never be able to convince anyone else,” Stark said.  “You have to be all-in; hook, line and sinker.”

“You have to believe wholeheartedly in what you are about to say and do because, if you aren’t 100% convinced yourself, you’ll never be able to convince anyone else.” 

Your belief could be the difference in your words being fierce enough to inspire battle cries or toothless enough to induce yawns.

“No one is going to catch your fire unless you have that mentality of ‘I truly believe what I’m saying here,’” she said. “Because if you don’t, people are going to wonder why you’re even bothering.”

3. Mindset

What’s the first thought that creeps into your mind in the minutes and seconds before you take the stage for your presentation or speech?

Most of us recite a long list of negative thoughts.: “I hope I don’t screw up.” “I hope I don’t mess up.” “I hope I don’t blank out.”

“We’re really great, as human beings, at worrying about worst-case scenarios and what can go wrong,” Stark said.

“Before a speech or before you get in front of a television camera or a job interview, you need to ask, ‘What am I saying to myself?’ and ‘What am I visualizing right now?’”

One of the keys to a successful presentation or speech is “pre-paving”, a method of visualizing the success you want to achieve.

“Before a speech or before you get in front of a television camera or a job interview, you need to ask, ‘What am I saying to myself?’ and ‘What am I visualizing right now?’,” Stark said. “You want to take some time to not only think the right thoughts and be in charge of what you’re saying to yourself, but then go even further and visualize – see exactly what you want to have happen as it’s unfolding.”

More Strategies From Patricia Stark

If you’d like to get more tips and strategies about public speaking and communication, check out Patricia Stark’s free, step-by-step Goaly strategy, “The Art of Presenting: Belief, Mindset and Intention”.

Here’s Patricia’s introductory video to the series: